Confidence

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If there is something that I don’t have, it’s confidence.  Whether my lack of this attribute comes from never measuring up when I was a child, or from just simply never thinking I was all that, if there is one thing that I, and many other people lack, it’s confidence.

There are many times that a lack of confidence is simply ridiculous.  From feeling that I can’t figure out a new recipe to being unsure of how to get somewhere that I’ve been before, it doesn’t take much to shake my confidence in myself.  While I realize that one of the reasons for a lack of confidence is the simple fact that we tend to remember when someone else said something negative to us as opposed to remembering the positive things (yes, this is an actual thing, and it just goes to show you how ingrained negativity can be), it can still be a hard thing to overcome.

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Before you let yourself get stymied by your lack of confidence, try to think of a few things.  Have you done whatever it is before, and if so, how did it go?  Did you live through it?  Good, if you’re here then you obviously did.  What could go wrong, and if that does go wrong what can you do to fix it?  Lots of times if you look at the possible negatives, you realize that there are solutions, and/or that the negative is a silly possibility that probably won’t happen.  Before GPS, I used to get lost almost every time I went somewhere new.  Even though I was nervous to go anywhere outside of my comfort zone, I realized that I could always stop and ask someone for directions!  And the best thing was that no one made fun of me, and everyone was always helpful.  See, my problem had a solution that worked every time.  I still deal with nerves every time I drive somewhere new, but it’s under control (thanks to GPS), but mostly because I make myself remember all the times the outcome was positive.

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Once again, the solution to a negative is a positive.  Confidence is the same way.  Make yourself think of a situation where you were not confident but pushed through anyway, and you survived.  Confidence is a muscle that you have to use.  At the very least, learn the words to the song “I Have Confidence” from the musical “The Sound of Music”.  I use the refrain all the time myself.  Of course I don’t go around singing it out loud (not all the time, anyway), but repeating the words to yourself can do wonders.  So, go out and believe in yourself!

 

 

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Am I Aryan?

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Just like the original Nazi’s, most of the people who call themselves “aryan” don’t look it.  Like Hitler, they are not what an “aryan” is “supposed” to look like.  How do I know?  The dictionary says of Nordic (mostly Scandinavian) descent.  So, does that mean that I, who am mostly Swedish (I’m a “mutt”, since I am also German, English and most likely everything in between).  Now, as far as looks go I’m the poster child for the “aryan race” – blond hair (not dyed); blue-eyed, and excessively fair-skinned.

Now, I’m sure your next question would be, do I think I’m “superior”, since I’ve got the physical aspects of being so – according to some people?  NO!  Let me say this, there is no superior race!  There is only the human race.  Get that through your heads.

As far as my German heritage is concerned, the tiny village my grandfather was born in no longer exists.  My grandfather came to New York sometime in the early 1930’s, while two of his older brothers went to Canada, leaving three other brothers and his younger sister along with his mother and father in their village.  When the Nazis discovered that someone in the village was hiding Jews, all the men and boys were lined up and shot and the women and girls were sent to Auschwitz.  The village was then destroyed.  I don’t even know the name of it, and my great aunt, who did survive, always wore long sleeves to cover her numbers.  I only saw them a few times, and that was definitely by mistake, as she was embarrassed by them.  I wish I could have talked to her about what had happened to her and my great-grandmother, but she hardly ever talked.  She was a sweet woman, and I loved her, but I never really knew her.

How can people find pride in claiming to be the Alt-right, KKK, or “Aryan”, I’ll never understand.  We had a war (World War II) over this and they lost.  So, are these people, by extension, losers? I know what I think, but what do you think?  How can anyone claim superiority over someone else?  Let me know how you feel about this in the comments below.  Do you agree that we are all one, and there is only the human race?

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Hate has no Place

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The recent events in this country have shown how divided we are as a community.  There is no place for hatred here.  On one side there is hatred, and on the other there is love for all.  There is no choice since love is the only choice.

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Let’s stop this by showing our love, building up our inclusive society and pushing back against hate.  We are one.

I Just Don’t Get It

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It seems like this country is simply going crazy.  There is more hatred being verbalized (and people being brutalized) all over.  I’m sure we’ve all seen the rants posted on social media of people verbally abusing others.  Where in the world is this hate coming from?  I simply cannot imagine anyone having the time in their lives to worry about the following:  where another person is from; what religion they choose to follow; what color someone else is; what gender they are; or what sexuality they practice.

Really, I’d like to know what is going on (or not going on) in the lives of these haters.  Seriously, how can they find the time to get involved in other people’s lives like this?  Don’t they have their own lives to worry about?  Don’t they also have to go to work, raise their children, worry about their loved ones?  How in the world do they have the time to worry about what other people are doing in their own private lives?

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And, the most important question of all – what the he** business is it of theirs anyway?  Really, is a medical doctor from India taking their job away?  Is a migrant worker who earns a living picking produce taking their job away?  Is the very fact that someone worships another “god” making their “god” smaller?  Does a different skin tone change their skin tone?  Does the love that someone has for another person change the love they have for their loved ones?  What difference does it make?  I just don’t get it.

I’ve heard all the “arguments” that people try to use to defend their hatred, and seriously they are simply and completely flawed.  Not to mention illogical.  I simply cannot imagine ever having the time or the inclination to stick my nose into something that is just not my business.  If you understand this, please explain it to me.

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To Accept Yourself

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Self-acceptance seems almost impossible.  However, that is the path to true happiness.  Trying to please others in order to find happiness is doomed to fail.  The only person you absolutely need to be accepted by is yourself.

Other people may only want you to be near them because of what they can “get” from you.  They might only accept you for a variety of things that you offer; your looks, your generous nature or even your love of them.  This is not true acceptance if it’s based upon conditions.

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Accepting yourself can lead to all kinds of fabulous benefits.  Once you become comfortable in your own skin, accepting all that you have to offer, and all your own foibles, your life can literally change.  Love yourself for who you are, faults and all.  It’s what makes you unique and wonderful.  Be yourself!

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Compassion is a Verb

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Compassion is important to me.  It should be important to all of us.  Compassion is what religion is supposed to be about.  “Do unto others as you would have done unto you.”  Is one of the most quoted statements from the Bible.  Somehow, we have lost whatever compassion we had as a country.  The reason I’m saying this is specifically related to the new TrumpCare Bill that is in Congress.  This bill will take insurance away from the very people who need it.  Anyone who is older, or has pre-existing conditions will lose their health care.  Well, if they don’t want to eat, or have a place to live, they might be able to pay their premiums.  Otherwise, those premiums will be too big to pay.

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Where is the compassion?  I look around me and I don’t see any.  Disabled people are blithely told to “just get a job”.  When was the last time you saw a blind or deaf person in your office?  How about the elderly?  Have you seen many 95-year-old delivery people, or an 85-year-old working at Walmart?  No, neither have I.  Even though this bill has “died”, they are still looking to simply get rid of the ACA, leaving millions of people without healthcare.

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It’s called compassion.  Find some, use some.  Be the person you were meant to be.  Compassion.  One day you will need it.  When you do, will it  be there?