Honoring Promises

you-are-what-you-do-not-what-you-say-youll-do-quote-1

I had a wonderful friend who was roughly 40 years older than I am.  Her name was Millie and she lived across the street from me.  A few years after I met her she became my unofficial mother due to family problems.

Millie was always there with solutions to issues, a shoulder to cry on, or most importantly, a good story and a laugh.  My children loved to go visit Millie to “help” her with her chores, read, or just be with her.  She was a special person, and the closest thing to a grandmother they had.  We often talked books, characters and plots.  She was an avid reader also, and we were always comparing books and authors.  Eventually Millie became very sick with ALS, and died.  Since she was a fan of Sue Grafton’s Alphabet Series, one of her regrets was that she wouldn’t live long enough to finish the series.  Since her children didn’t read, she wanted me to read the entire “Kinsey Series” as she called it as a remembrance to her.

Y is for Yesterday

This task took me longer than I’d like to think about to complete.  I was always looking for ways to avoid it.  For one thing, I’d have to completely understand that she was gone, and not just away at the hospital, and this was something that took me a long time to get through.  For another thing, Sue Grafton hadn’t finished the series, and not only that, she was taking a long time to do so.  Finally, about two years or so ago, I decided I’d start the series and read it over a period of time, planning on finishing whenever the last novel was published.  This was not to be, since as all of us Sue Grafton fans know, the alphabet ends at “Y”.  (For those of you who don’t read Sue Grafton, she died in 2017 from cancer without finishing her series.)  So, for now, we’re all left wondering what did become of Kinsey Millhone?  I’ve put my imagination to work and come up with a few theories, but the truth is, we probably never will know.

S. Grafton

Sue Grafton

Honoring promises is important.  One reason for my not doing this sooner was fear that if I did finish, my memories of Millie would fade.  Yes, that is nonsensical, I know.  But, once I started the series, I was so glad.  The character of Kinsey Millhone has been an exciting one to get to know.  She’s added a lot to my life, and I often think about her.  Not only does Sue Grafton live on, but my wonderful friend and surrogate mother lives on as well.  Thank you, Millie, for this last gift.

 

 

Advertisements

Never Make Yourself Smaller

IMG_4189

Don’t allow other people to make you smaller or “less than” what you are.  It’s so easy to make yourself smaller in order for someone else, who you love, to feel better about themselves.  After all we tell ourselves, it’s because we love them that we become smaller.  Why shouldn’t we help someone we love feel better about themselves?

However, it’s not up to us to become smaller, “less than”, to make someone else feel larger.  Our beliefs in ourselves matter also.  If someone insists that you need to be smaller, it’s a large indicator that they really don’t have your best interests at heart.  It’s not up to us to be “less than” so someone else can feel “more than”.  A true friend will celebrate who and what you are, not make you feel smaller.  Someone who professes to love you will never ask you to make yourself smaller.  No matter how difficult, be true to who you are.

8e99bc7a9e38a4791e78b44f66336399--cool-love-quotes-great-quotes

Where Thoughts Go, Energy Flows

a16186be609d0683fa0ff16df0d5862b

This is just a little reminder for you.  Try not to fill your brain up with negativity.  Even though negative thoughts are so easy, don’t be tempted to dwell on them. While we all know that it’s easier to think about how terrible a problem is, the only way to change it is to think of a solution.

While not every problem has a solution, sometimes the solution is to simply stop dwelling on the problem.  In life, there are always going to be things that we can’t change.  We can’t change someone else, so a solution is to stop dwelling on their behavior and think about something you can change – like not letting what they choose to do and say bother you.

flowers-or-weeds

Of course, this is hard – negativity (complaining, dwelling on situations) is so much easier than positivity, and finding a solution.  Remember, it’s a process.  Like anything, it will take you quite a while to focus your energy on what you can do.  Put your thoughts toward positivity and see how it changes your life.

May Goals

May-Goals-f

Here it is already May!  The snow is finally gone and now we’ve got lots of wood to process for next winter.  And, that’s a good thing, since we’ll need a lot of wood if next winter is as cold and snowy as this past winter was.  So, as far as goals are concerned, here they are:

Fitness Goals:  I’ve got the goal of at least 18 miles of walking a week.  I’ve been averaging about 17 or so weekly, so this is definitely a doable goal.  Also keep on doing what I’ve been doing.

Spring Cleaning:  So far, I’ve done one floor of my house, and am working (about 3 rooms to go) on the next floor and have the basement to finish after that.  My daughter who is much cleverer than I am figured out a fabulous way to dust the logs on the walls (we have a log cabin), and they look so good!  We’ll continue doing that as we keep cleaning the house.

Writing:  I’m struggling with the fiction-writing thing lately.  I’ve been so busy cleaning (actually that’s just an excuse), but I intend to write at least one 600-word story this month, and the goal is two.  We’ll see on this one.

Lessons:  I hope to finish up with my coaching stuff and get my certificate.  This is one goal that I’ve had every month for months, and I just can’t seem to attain it.  I’m hopeful that this is the month.

Health:  I want to eat healthier.  It’s amazing what different kinds of unhealthy vegan foods there are out there in the world.  With the warmer weather, there will be more fresh fruits and vegetables on offer, and I want to start adding them into my diet.  No more vegan candy!

Mental Health:  The past few months have been pretty chaotic, and there are a lot emotional events that I need to process.  I haven’t been writing in my journal, so this month I’m going to try and work some issues out by doing that.  I really need to clear my head and take care of myself.

Anyway, there are my goals.  Have you made any goals for the month, and if so, what are they?  Let me know in the comments below, and we can cheer each other on. Happy May!

da1576779861085b5ba168ef4ec76133

Nope, Not Right Now

coffee123

Last week as I was wasting time on Instagram, I saw a post stating that California was making coffee shops post that coffee was carcinogenic.  Well, my initial response to that news was to swipe right by with the words, “nope, not now” in my mind.  I mean, really.  A few years ago, I tried to give up coffee, but went back to drinking it.  After all, I don’t drink, smoke or eat meat and dairy… and coffee is my little weakness, and even though I know it’s not the best thing, it’s the one thing that I’ve decided to drink that’s not entirely healthy.  But, carcinogenic?

Im-not-addicted-to-coffee-were-just-in-a-commited-relationship

So, after waiting a respectable amount of time (really, just putting it off), I decided to look into the science of this claim.  It turns out that overly roasted coffee beans can contain a chemical called acrylamide, which can cause mutations and damage in DNA, which then can increase the risk of getting cancer.  However, it’s unclear as to if the amount of acrylamide found in coffee can be considered a risk, since the animals that it was found to be a risk in were given levels between 1,000 and 10,000 more then were found in food that humans would ingest.  Therefore, the scientists do not consider this a risk, and have not stated that it is one as regards to coffee.  I’ve left the link below for you to read.  Now, I think I’ll go enjoy my morning coffee…thank you very much!

https://www.livescience.com/62177-california-coffee-cancer-warning.html

 

What About Education?

nelson-mandela-quotes-sayings-wise-wisdom-education

It seems that in America the states have lots of money for building new prisons, but no money for education.  I am talking specifically about Oklahoma, but this is true of other states as well.  In full disclosure, I am the daughter of a teacher, and I also homeschooled my children from grades 3 to 8.  I believe strongly in a good education system where science and math are taught, along with accurate history, literature and the arts.  I well-rounded education is a requirement for a good society.  I’m not alone in this, since many of our ancestors were also in agreement.

I don’t know if you’ve been paying attention to the various teachers strikes, but they were not only striking for more money (remember, a teacher must have a Bachelors degree in teaching, but also a Master’s Degree – that is six years of college), but they are also striking for newer textbooks (some are over twenty years old), there are not enough books for the number of students, there are leaking roofs, moldy walls and ceilings, exposed wires, broken desks and chairs, no paper, and the list goes on and on.

albert einstein

So, my question is this?  How did this happen?  Why is education being slowly strangled due to lack of money?  As a child I can remember when people who were smart were looked up to.  At some point, many parts of society decided to wage a war on education.  Being “smart” became less desirable, with put-downs such as “nerd” and “geek” being used.  Being a “bookworm” was a negative thing.  I wish I knew why education is no longer valued.  I do have some thoughts, including the fact that if people are kept from learning deductive reasoning, they may be easier to trick.  I’m leaving some links below that I hope you will check out.  The videos of the schools are really difficult to watch because they look like third world schools.  Please comment on this subject below.

BBC

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/answer-sheet/wp/2014/02/05/americas-school-funding-problems-state-by-state/?noredirect=on

 

Announcement – I’m Making a Change

change-pixabay

I have been writing this blog since June, 2014, and for all that time, I’ve been putting three posts per week out into the world.  It’s been fun, and I’ve learned a lot, since many of my posts have taken some research.  However, lately my level of commitment has been leveling off, and I don’t feel as compelled to post as before.  Four years is a long time, and I need to write fewer posts in order to spend more time with my fiction writing and study commitments.

So, I will be posting only on Monday and Friday from now on.  In the future I may add a few Wednesday posts, maybe, but right now I need to focus on some other parts of my writing life.  So, rest assured, I’ll still be posting, just not three times a week.  Hope to share some of my creative pursuits with you in the future!

78701f686e2d55b55841bcf33dc5ae54