What is brain dump, and is it for You?

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I recently read about this method of de-cluttering your mind, called a brain dump.  It encourages you to write down any excess information you’ve been cluttering your mind with in order to leave your brain with more open space to fill with new information.  What is being suggested is that at the end of every day you spend ten minutes writing down all the “stuff” that is unnecessary, or extraneous information so that it’s not floating around in your brain.  If you can’t think of anything to write, just write “I can’t think of anything to write” until the dam opens and you can release the excessive build-up.

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I actually think this is like writing down your problems, extraneous thoughts or emotions in your journal.  Once you get things out, you can either stop worrying about them, or come up with solutions to problems.  Or you can just get it out, and stop thinking about it. There are times when we spend way too much time thinking about something that is not really important, but because we’re thinking about that we aren’t as productive as we should be.

That’s what a “brain dump” is.  It’s a way to empty out the unnecessary, useless crap from our minds so that we can focus on the things that are important.  Personally, I just call this journaling, since that seems to do the trick for me.  However, a brain dump can be used to write down important information that you might need later (and perhaps for public use), while a journal is usually private.

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However you want to accomplish this, you can decide.  Maybe both ways are good for you.  I do have a notebook where I will write things I might want to use later, and a separate journal for private things.  I do find that once I’ve written “stuff “down, I feel much more grounded in the now.  Let me know if you do some kind version of this in your life, and if it helps you.

http://www.lifehack.org/620550/how-to-declutter-your-brain-and-get-organized?ref=mail&mtype=newsletter_tier_2&mid=20170811&uid=188713&hash=6f7e757f413f454145424c6d7b783a6f7b79&utm_source=newsletter_tier_2&utm_medium=email&action=click

 

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How to Stay Positive

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Positivity is a mind-set that is hard to maintain in a negative world.  Every day there are many new injustices to deal with, so how does a person keep themselves positive?  This is a question that I’ve been pondering over for quite some time.  I’m not very good at doing this myself, but here are a few of the things that I feel help.

Number one is that I exercise.  Endorphins are wonderful things.  As a person who is just this side of depressed, I find that doing something physical every single day is a must for my mental health.

Another important thing is that I take St. John’s Wort.  I know that it doesn’t work for everyone, however, I have found benefits to taking it every day.

I have also found that it helps when I try to do yoga every day.  I’m not good at it, I won’t be posting photos of myself doing any positions on social media.  I haven’t ever taken a yoga class.  However, I do Sun Salutation almost every day both as a meditation, and a stretch.  Good stuff and I highly recommend doing it.  If there is one thing we all need to do is stretch and calm down.  This is most helpful.

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And, finally, the last thing that I do is that I try to work on my goals every single day.  I set goals for the week on Sundays, and try to get most of them done by Saturday.  The more goals I accomplish, the more positive I feel.

Share your ideas on remaining positive.  Maybe you’ve  got some wonderful things I could add to my list.

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Confidence

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This quote is so true.  For many of us, we spend so much time trying to be something that we are not, that we lose track of who we are. I know that for most of my life I’ve been trying so hard to please other people that for a long time I lost my sense of self.  In fact, I often feel like I’m stumbling around in the dark trying to figure out who I am.  Confidence in myself is something that I’ve struggled with for a long time, as I’m sure many other people have.  By always pleasing others, I’ve come to a point in my life when I don’t really know who I am.  How do you find the confidence to be yourself when you’ve lost yourself somewhere along the way?

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My solution to this dilemma has been to try to get back to those things that made me happy before I began trying to please others.  The longer I’ve been working on improving and changing myself, the more confident I’ve become.  Another side-effect of this is that I’ve become a lot more understanding of not only my own deficiencies, but other peoples.  I also spend less time complaining about things than I did before.  Confidence is a gift that we give to ourselves.

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Music and Health

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As someone who spends way too much time being depressed and suffering from anxiety about the state of the world – and other things that I can really do little about, I do my best to listen to music that is designed specifically to soothe, relax and bring about a peaceful frame of mind.  Because of this I was wondering if listening to certain kinds of music had been found to scientifically improve mood and health.  So, of course, I looked into it.

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So, what I’ve discovered is that yes music is a valid, scientific way of improving health.  It is used in a variety of medical situations including depression, anxiety, autism, dementia, brain development and sleep disorders.  It is also used in the premature baby ward in many hospitals to help promote the growth and health of these babies.  Different types of music also enhance different feelings; for example, rock music increases the heart-rate and can either agitate or energize.  Personally, I try to usually listen to peaceful and relaxing music since I’m just a bit hyper and on edge naturally.

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Do you purposefully listen to different types of music to either energize or to relax?  Let me know in the comments below.

http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.3109/10673229.2011.549769

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/natural-standard/201306/music-therapy-health-and-wellness

 

 

The Destructiveness of Verbal (Emotional) Abuse

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There are various forms of abuse, but verbal abuse often gets ignored, and/or brushed aside as though it doesn’t really have any effects on the person who is abused.  The reason for this is that it doesn’t leave any physical scars.  There are many people who believe that if there isn’t a physical scar, it doesn’t matter.   Many women who suffer from verbal abuse are told “at least it isn’t physical”.  Since this is a common statement, it can make the victims of verbal abuse feel like it must not be happening – it’s all in their heads.

What is verbal abuse, and how can you decide if this a part of your relationship with your significant other?  Here is a definition:  “any act including confinement, isolation, verbal assault, humiliation, intimidation, infantilization, or any other treatment which may diminish the sense of identity, dignity, and self-worth.”1

Emotional abuse is also known as psychological abuse or as “chronic verbal aggression” by researchers. People who suffer from emotional abuse tend to have very low self-esteem, show personality changes (such as becoming withdrawn) and may even become depressed, anxious or suicidal.

https://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/emotional-psychological-abuse/emotional-abuse-definitions-signs-symptoms-examples/

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There are many long-term effects of verbal (emotional) abuse that can include:  chronic pain, migraine, headaches, indigestion, bowel issues and stress-related heart conditions.  The psychological effects can include anxiety, depression, PTSD, memory gap disorders, sleep and/or eating disorders, hyper-vigilance or extreme startle response, anger issues, addiction issues, irritability and/or anger issues, suicide or self-mutilation.

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As you can see, being in a relationship where there is verbal (emotional) abuse has long-term effects.  The first thing you can do is figure out if you are in such a relationship.  The second thing you need to do is decide whether or not you want (need) to stay.  There should be no judgments on whether or not you decide to stay.  I understand that there are many considerations to be made.  If you’re dependent on the abuser, feel a need to stay; or whatever reason, this is your decision.  However, if you do decide to stay, being aware of the abuse is a step in the right direction.  You will no longer feel as if you’re “going crazy”, or wonder if you’re being “gas lighted”.  You will be aware, and can change your reactions to what is happening to you.

I’m leaving links in this post so that you can make yourself aware of what verbal (emotional) abuse is, what could be happening to your mental and physical health, and how you can care for yourself.  Be aware, be safe and be healthy.

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https://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/verbal-abuse/effects-of-verbal-abuse-on-children-women-and-men/

https://www.7cups.com/blog/post/81/12+Effective+Ways+to+Defend+Yourself+From+Verbal+Abuse.html

https://www.californiapsychics.com/blog/mind-body-spirit/the-best-strategies-against-verbal-abuse.html

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The Effects of Constant Criticism

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I live with two people who are free with their criticism.  Some of this criticism includes such things as the way the spices are organized to the way I do my laundry.  If this was constructive criticism I wouldn’t be so upset.  However, it is not.  This is done specifically to make me feel “less than”. It takes a toll on a person, and I decided to do a little research into exactly what kind of effects this has on the person being criticized. One notable effect is that being constantly criticized can really affect your self-esteem and sense of self-worth.  This is true, since after I’ve been criticized I really feel sick, whether it’s a headache, upset stomach, or both.  Then I find that in the days following such an attack I just want to curl up in my bed, hide under the covers and do nothing.  It takes every ounce of energy I’ve got to continue on my path to change.

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When I looked up information on this subject, there was a lot of information regarding parents being overly critical of their children.   My parents were overly critical.  If I got a score of 100% correct, I was asked why I didn’t get 101%. When I graduated college with a double Major in four years, my Mother was upset that I didn’t also have a Minor.  My achievements were not recognized, only my “faults”.

So, I’m now struggling with this issue in my life, and either the attacks are getting worse, or I’m not dealing with the after-effects as well as in the past.  Being told to grow a thicker skin is not helpful, and not something I’d recommend to other people.  However, I try to look at the problems of the person who is attacking me.  As far as I’m concerned, the only reason they are attacking me has to do with them, not me.  If the criticism is valid, I look for the truths in it.  However, when the criticism is generally about how I do something, or say something, or in some cases just the very act of my being is the object of the criticism, then I try to remember that it’s not valid.   So, look into the critical statements, see if it’s valid and if it isn’t , consider the source.

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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/donna-labermeier/negative-impact-of-criticism-_b_3829346.html

 

Keeping Depression at Bay

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Here are some quotes for those of us who sign petitions, write letters and still feel depressed about the way the country is going.  Keep up your chins, hold love in your hearts, and keep on hoping for a new day.

 

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