Quotes on Changing for the Better

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Changing things about your life can be hard.  For every step forward, there are times that you feel you’ve gone back two steps.  It’s hard to keep up the momentum, but the only way to succeed is to keep going.  Here are a few quotes to keep you on your path.

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What’s New on the Rape Front? – Yes, there is Snark!

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Well, what is new regarding women and rape?  Here are a few things that you might be surprised to learn.  In nine states a rapist has the ability to share custody of the child that was produced from a rape.  Yep, that’s right.  If you’re a rapist, gone to jail for raping a woman, you still get to share custody with the product of that rape.  And, the woman who you raped has to suck it up and have continued contact with you.  Yay for you!

Bill Cosby, who drugged and raped plenty of women, has avoided jail time due to a mistrial, and is now going around the country with the express purpose of teaching other men how to avoid going to jail after they’ve raped women.  I guess you should teach what you know, right?

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Betsy DeVos has rescinded Title IX campus sexual assault guidance, of the legal requirement to report a sexual assault, because maybe, maybe there might be a (one) case of a female student lying about rape, and what would that do to the male student?   Of course, 19% of female college students report being raped, but hey, who cares about that?

And, just to end on a “happy” note, the White House website page entitled “Rape and Sexual Assault: A Renewed Call to Action” has been taken down.  Don’t be too alarmed though, the pages regarding Climate Change and Animal Welfare have also been taken down.  So, victims of sexual assault are in good company.  Fake News, nothing to see here!

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Confidence

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If there is something that I don’t have, it’s confidence.  Whether my lack of this attribute comes from never measuring up when I was a child, or from just simply never thinking I was all that, if there is one thing that I, and many other people lack, it’s confidence.

There are many times that a lack of confidence is simply ridiculous.  From feeling that I can’t figure out a new recipe to being unsure of how to get somewhere that I’ve been before, it doesn’t take much to shake my confidence in myself.  While I realize that one of the reasons for a lack of confidence is the simple fact that we tend to remember when someone else said something negative to us as opposed to remembering the positive things (yes, this is an actual thing, and it just goes to show you how ingrained negativity can be), it can still be a hard thing to overcome.

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Before you let yourself get stymied by your lack of confidence, try to think of a few things.  Have you done whatever it is before, and if so, how did it go?  Did you live through it?  Good, if you’re here then you obviously did.  What could go wrong, and if that does go wrong what can you do to fix it?  Lots of times if you look at the possible negatives, you realize that there are solutions, and/or that the negative is a silly possibility that probably won’t happen.  Before GPS, I used to get lost almost every time I went somewhere new.  Even though I was nervous to go anywhere outside of my comfort zone, I realized that I could always stop and ask someone for directions!  And the best thing was that no one made fun of me, and everyone was always helpful.  See, my problem had a solution that worked every time.  I still deal with nerves every time I drive somewhere new, but it’s under control (thanks to GPS), but mostly because I make myself remember all the times the outcome was positive.

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Once again, the solution to a negative is a positive.  Confidence is the same way.  Make yourself think of a situation where you were not confident but pushed through anyway, and you survived.  Confidence is a muscle that you have to use.  At the very least, learn the words to the song “I Have Confidence” from the musical “The Sound of Music”.  I use the refrain all the time myself.  Of course I don’t go around singing it out loud (not all the time, anyway), but repeating the words to yourself can do wonders.  So, go out and believe in yourself!

 

 

Motivational Thoughts

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There is so much “stuff” happening both inside my life, and outside.  This could be a very good thing if this were happy, helpful “stuff”.  Unfortunately, it’s mostly negative.  So, once again, I’m coming up for air and readying to dive down into the murk of working on myself.  Yes, the only thing I can actually change is myself.  How I spend my time, what I choose to think about, and the positivity that I want to bring into my life.  So here are some quotes I’ve found to think about.   Hope this helps you with your motivation and positivity.

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Being Quiet

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The world that we live in is fast.  I know, I’m a person who runs around for a lot of my time trying to get things done as fast as I can.  I talk fast and I walk fast.  The sooner it’s done, the faster it’s over.  That’s usually how I live my life.  I speak so fast that it’s hard for others to understand what it is that I’m saying.  I’ve been working on slowing my speech down, and moving a little more slowly since I know that operating in a super-fast mode is doing myself no favors.  There is probably more than one reason I’ve got high blood pressure.  Slowing down is a struggle.  It’s something we all probably have to work on.  The real problem with living life in the fast lane is that you lose touch with your inner self.  Do you feel that you’ve got a “speed” problem?  Let me know how you deal with it in the comments below.

 

Negativity Kills Your Joy of Life

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Living with negative people is difficult.  Heck, even talking to negative people can cause you to feel like life isn’t worth living.  Especially with them.  For a while now, I’ve been trying to work on myself, change the things that I can and move forward with my own life.  However, when confronted consistently with someone whose goal is to make me feel less than, I find it difficult to remain positive.  I have no idea why this is happening, and I’ve decided that I am not going to spend any more time on wondering what I could have possibly done wrong to cause this abusive behavior.  Mostly because I am aware that it’s not just me that is suffering this abuse, and not one of the other people deserve it, either.  This is just who this person is.  Unfortunately, this is also a person who is a close family member that I apparently must live with.

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I wish I had wonderful advice to give anyone else who is in this situation, but I don’t.  I can tell you what it is that I’m doing to help cope.  First of all, I’ve been concentrating on improving myself.  I’ve been working on eating healthy, getting daily exercise, and working toward my goals.  I’ve also been working on decreasing my blood pressure by meditating as well as I can, (it’s a work in progress); practicing Yoga; and saying daily affirmations.  Self-worth is something that most of us have to work at, and right now my best way to help that is saying affirmations a couple of times a day.  In fact, I’ve found that the most positive thing I can do is to say them before I fall asleep.  That plants the positive in my mind so that it can work on my subconscious all night.  I’m working on saying them throughout the day, but I am not as consistent as I probably should be.   The other thing that I’ve been doing is to have as little reaction to the negative abuse as I can.  This is hard, but it helps.  If the negative person doesn’t get the reaction they desire, they will leave you alone.  If they don’t, my solution is to hide in the bathroom.

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If you are dealing with a highly negative person in your life, please let me know how you cope in the comments below.  This is a difficult way to live, and I would love to hear how you manage.

 

Fall Goals

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I’ve always felt that September was a time for new beginnings.  It’s probably because school starts in September and that’s a new beginning.  Anyway, I find myself shaking the sand of summer off my feet and gearing up toward my fall goals.  I have actually been thinking about how I want to organize my daily life so that I can get more accomplished each day.  This is a goal that I feel like is going to take some major work to put into effect.  I feel like I’m wasting a lot of time during the day so I want to stop that.  That is probably the most important goal for me.  However, there are many other things that I want to accomplish this fall.

Of course, like most people I need to accomplish my fall cleaning.  I’ve been working on de-cluttering the house, but I haven’t gotten as far as I’d like over the summer.  I’ll be continuing that while at the same time doing the dreaded window-washing, furniture moving and deep cleaning that needs to be done.

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Another major goal is to write creatively each day for at least one hour, but hopefully two. There are a lot of projects that I’d like to both finish, and start.  I’ll let you know more about these writing projects at a later date.

My last “big” fall goal is to get my business up and running.  Again, I’ll write more about that once I feel like I know what I’m doing.  Okay, I never really know what I’m doing, but I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed right now.

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Those are the biggest fall goals (thank goodness fall lasts for a while).  What are your goals?  Do you have anything really big that you plan on accomplishing?  Let me know in the comments below.