If you tend to dwell in negativity that is all that you will find. Looking for the best in life will force you to find it. We do tend to find what it is that we’re looking for, after all. I know this can be difficult (I too have spent way too much time in negativity), but remember, if you change your focus, you can change your life.
When times are hard, look at what is going right and build positivity from there. Life is never just one thing. Positive and negative both surround us, but if you focus on the good things it will give you the strength to overcome the negative.
Don’t allow other people to make you smaller or “less than” what you are. It’s so easy to make yourself smaller in order for someone else, who you love, to feel better about themselves. After all we tell ourselves, it’s because we love them that we become smaller. Why shouldn’t we help someone we love feel better about themselves?
However, it’s not up to us to become smaller, “less than”, to make someone else feel larger. Our beliefs in ourselves matter also. If someone insists that you need to be smaller, it’s a large indicator that they really don’t have your best interests at heart. It’s not up to us to be “less than” so someone else can feel “more than”. A true friend will celebrate who and what you are, not make you feel smaller. Someone who professes to love you will never ask you to make yourself smaller. No matter how difficult, be true to who you are.
This summer has been unbearable in New England. The humidity levels have been outrageous, we have had day after day of unexpected torrential downpours that are reminiscent of downpours in Florida. Since there are many people who don’t have air conditioning (my family included) life has been something to be endured.
So, since I don’t have t.v., and my newspaper is often not delivered, I decided to see just what in the heck is going on. Unfortunately, the news is dire. Get ready for more and more of this. There have been record heat recorded all over the world. Heat waves that are over and above anything seen before. Not only that, but we’ve had drought and wildfires all over also, not just in the U.S., but also Sweden (!).
I suggest that we start doing something about this. Extreme weather will be on its way also…hurricanes, etc. etc. Are you hurricane ready? I know I’m not. How have you been coping with the heat? I’ve been standing in an ice-cold shower before bed every night. During the day I’ve been reading while sitting in front of a fan. Work-outs happen in the early morning, and it’s been over a week since I took a walk outside. I’m dreaming of snow storms and the cold weather. It can’t come fast enough for me!
I just wanted to post this quote I found for those of you who are dealing with hyper-critical family members. One of the terrible things about being criticized for everything you do, is how it dismantles your sense of self. Remember when someone is belittling you, it says more about them then it does you. No matter how hard it may be, look within for your sense of self, stand tall, and even if you have to dance in the shadows, dance.
This is just a little reminder for you. Try not to fill your brain up with negativity. Even though negative thoughts are so easy, don’t be tempted to dwell on them. While we all know that it’s easier to think about how terrible a problem is, the only way to change it is to think of a solution.
While not every problem has a solution, sometimes the solution is to simply stop dwelling on the problem. In life, there are always going to be things that we can’t change. We can’t change someone else, so a solution is to stop dwelling on their behavior and think about something you can change – like not letting what they choose to do and say bother you.
Of course, this is hard – negativity (complaining, dwelling on situations) is so much easier than positivity, and finding a solution. Remember, it’s a process. Like anything, it will take you quite a while to focus your energy on what you can do. Put your thoughts toward positivity and see how it changes your life.