The Gilmore Girls, My Daughter and Me

My daughter and I just recently began watching the Gilmore Girls on Netflix. My daughter had been reading references to this show (mostly referring to the character of Dean) for a long time on social media. We had never watched it while it was on T.V., so we decided to give it a go. Just to let you know how much we love it, we’re already on Season 4 (after starting watching in July) – not too bad for binge-watching.

One of the things that we love about this show is the relationship between Lorelai and Rory. While they are best friends, there is still a defined Mother/Daughter relationship. I love the way that Lorelai has raised Rory by giving her the leeway to make mistakes, while still being aware and ready to help.

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Usually Mother/Daughter relationships portrayed on T.V. are full of angst and anger, while this one is full of love and acceptance. As a matter of fact, this relationship is one of the very few I’ve seen that somewhat mirrors my relationship with my daughter. Lorelai wants what Rory wants; not what she wants for Rory. This is the way that I’ve tried to raise my children. I’ll never forget that directly after my son was born; my sister asked me what I wanted him to be when he grew up. I was never so shocked in my life. At first I was so thrown that I was speechless, and then answered that I wanted him to be whatever he wanted to be. What I really wanted for him was to be happy. This is the way I still feel. I want both my children to be happy.

Yesterday, I took my daughter to the airport to send her on her way to Lithuania, where she will be visiting her best friend who lives there. All summer, I’ve been given various nuggets of advice by people who knew she would be traveling by herself. The statements that took me aback the most were the ones when people acted like I shouldn’t trust her; and the people who outright told me it wouldn’t be “safe” for her to go. In answer to these doubters: firstly, I’ve trusted my daughter for many years now and she’s never let me down; and secondly, nothing is ever completely safe.

So, when I saw her off at the airport, I had to simply take myself out of the equation (after all, I am going to miss her dreadfully) and do what was right for her. It’s not about me. This is her adventure to have. When she comes back I hope we’ll have time to finish watching Gilmore Girls!

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